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ROBIN HOOD: GHOSTS OF SHERWOOD (2012) Review

ROBIN HOOD: GHOSTS OF SHERWOOD is a 2012 Germany movie directed by Uwe Boll. It is a retelling of the classic Robin Hood story, with a few supernatural elements thrown in for good measure.

Had a village idiot managed to hold his quill right end up for long enough to pen this then, torn with shame at creating such an abomination, he would have no choice but to make penance by flagellating himself with a bundle of sharpened turnips for all eternity.

After over 80 minutes of Robin Hood for retards – coupled with dialogue that would not sound out of place in the local asylum for the educationally challenged – we finally get some zombie type of shit going on.

It’s all to do with potions. You just shouldn’t trust that old hag in the forest who everyone names as a witch, even if she does have the decency to label all her potions so that even the stupidest in Sherwood can read them.

Anyway, Robin dies, sells his soul to the devil, dies again and Maid Marian swipes some potions to bring back Robin – resulting in Robin and his undead, not so merry men. Hurrah.

They go on the rampage a bit having turned into fast running zombies – most of whom look like they were made up using liberal smearings of cow dung to the face – and pretty much get fucked over by Maid Marian and Little John wielding magic potions stolen from the old hag.

It’s not exactly script writing par excellence, the only shock is that the writer managed to cease dribbling enough so that the script was legible and not smeared by drool.

Effects are crap, there’s not a sniff of tits let alone any tupping amidst the trees, you’ve seen more convincing swordfights between some spotty kids wielding branches on the local housing estate, and you could have spent your time more profitably doing just about anything else other than watching this movie.

Robin Hood: Ghosts of Shitwood. Avoid it like you’d avoid acts of buggery with that syphilis ridden, leprosy suffering, louse riddled, dunderhead of a village idiot we opened this review by mentioning. If you ignore this warning then on your own head be it, don’t come moaning that you regret it the morning after.

The movie opens with Robin Hood (played by Tomás Arana) and his band of merry men being ambushed by the Sheriff of Nottingham (played by Michael Schenk) and his men. Robin Hood is killed in the attack, but is resurrected by a mysterious hooded figure. The figure tells Robin Hood that he has been chosen to save England from the tyranny of Prince John (played by Ralf Moeller) and his evil henchmen.

Robin Hood and his band of merry men then set out to right the wrongs of Prince John and the Sheriff of Nottingham. Along the way, they encounter a number of obstacles, including a group of ghosts who are bent on revenge.

Overall, I enjoyed ROBIN HOOD: GHOSTS OF SHERWOOD. It was a fun, action-packed movie with a few good scares thrown in. The acting was good, and the special effects were well done. If you’re a fan of the Robin Hood story, or just looking for a good movie to watch, I would recommend checking out ROBIN HOOD: GHOSTS OF SHERWOOD.

Synopsis

When Robin Hood and his band of merry men learn that the Sheriff of Nottingham has been using black magic to terrorize the people of Nottingham, they put their skills to the test to stop him.

As the Sheriff’s reign of terror continues, the people of Nottingham turn to Robin Hood and his band of merry men for help. Robin and his men use their skills to outwit the Sheriff and his men, and eventually put an end to his reign of terror.

The movie is set in medieval England, and features a mix of live action and animation.

Movie Details

Director: Oliver Krekel
Writers: Oliver Krekel, Seán Lee
Actors: Martin Thon, Tom Savini, Kai Borchardt, Ramona Kuen
Release Year: 2012